Divorce can be an emotionally draining experience, even for couples who agree that divorce is the best way forward. The end of a relationship brings about a flood of feelings, from sadness to anger — and sometimes resentment.
While these emotions are natural, they can often fuel arguments that prolong divorce. Fortunately, there are ways couples can minimize arguments during divorce and maintain a level of civility throughout the proceedings.
1. Prioritize communication and set boundaries
When emotions are high, it’s easy to misinterpret statements or assume the worst of each other. By fostering clear, respectful and calm communication, divorcing couples can avoid misunderstandings that lead to unnecessary arguments.
Setting boundaries is equally important. For example, divorcing couples can agree on specific times and methods for communication, such as only discussing divorce matters during scheduled meetings or through email to avoid heated exchanges.
Being mindful of tone, choosing words carefully and respecting each other’s emotional space can also de-escalate a situation that would otherwise result in an argument. Furthermore, active listening, where each person feels heard and validated, can go a long way in minimizing conflict.
2. Keep the focus on the future, not the past
It’s easy to get caught up in past grievances when emotions are running high, but revisiting past wrongdoings can quickly spiral into blame and accusations. It’s crucial to keep the focus on the future rather than dwelling on the past. This can help minimize conflict.
Divorcing couples can try to stay objective and forward-looking when discussing divorce-related issues. This mindset helps shift the conversation from emotions tied to past events to finding mutually beneficial solutions.
Divorce is rarely easy, but by prioritizing communication and focusing on the future, couples can reduce the likelihood of arguments and make the process more manageable for everyone involved. By taking these proactive steps and enlisting legal support, couples can navigate their separation with greater civility and even begin the healing process sooner.